Particle's Custom RPG

General => Common Topic Symposium => Topic started by: 12Stones on July 2, 2005 05:22 am CDT

Title: Critiques please?
Post by: 12Stones on July 2, 2005 05:22 am CDT

Just 'finished' this song in FL Studio..  'finished' because it's not really finished.  I added a few change ups but I haven't recorded it yet and I'm about to leave for the beach.  Let me know what you think (besides the fact that there isn't a hard enough hit when the beat kicks in).

Perfect Disguise - Last Hope (http://http://www.follybeach.com/surfpics/LastHope.zip)

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Post by: DaveMan on July 5, 2005 04:36 am CDT

yah i agree, no Real peak in the song. and the intro is a lil long but still good. by that i mean that it takes too long for the first major change to come in. just a long buildup to another build up. but sounds like it would be great with a lil work

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Post by: Vorter_X_ on July 5, 2005 05:35 am CDT

that says everything i was going to say o.0

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Post by: 12Stones on July 6, 2005 12:42 pm CDT

Revised edition..  much better than the first, but still not quite finished.

http://www.follybeach.com/surfpics/untitledFORnow.mp3 (http://www.follybeach.com/surfpics/untitledFORnow.mp3)

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Post by: KoRo on July 6, 2005 01:32 pm CDT

I like the almost mysterious or mystical sound to the the song (Only listening to first version right now, havent gotten to second one yet) It sounds pretty cool, where are the sounds from? i thought I heard a countdown from 3 in there..The only bit I would say is that the base rhythm doesnt change at all. Maybe if you shifted some things up, and definately try to give a climactic edge to it, you could definately turn it into something!

Now the second one is definately much better. The only thing is the...is it a synthesizer? the organ sounding instrument thats in there...it seems like it sticks out a little too much. The piece reminds me of an old newgrounds game called 'Combat Instinct.' They both sound alike in the background sense; its getting better!

Out of sheer suggestion, not saying that you need to change anything at all, I think that you might be able to get a little more feel out of the song if you used more minor scale notes in the background (I dont know what key the song is in, but i think you know what I mean), and even add a few more instruments to the mix? Wow i wrote a lot..

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Post by: 12Stones on July 6, 2005 01:45 pm CDT

The voice tracks are just random ones that are tossed around between people in collab.  There are 2..  "Launch in 3..2..1" and "We have a 138 in progress..  *beep*".

Yeah, i'm still looking around for more instruments that sound good.  I'll tone down the synth line a little bit too.  Thanks for the critiques.

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Post by: KoRo on July 6, 2005 01:48 pm CDT

Keep publishing! I want to hear the next version